Today is Theodore Roosevelt’s 160th birthday. Here is my favorite thing that he ever said.

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out where the strong man stumbled, nor where the doer of good deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who knows the great devotions, the great enthusiasms and who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best wins, knowing the thrills of high achievement but who if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."

Negotiation is an unavoidable part of life.  Whether you are negotiating a starting salary at a new job, the purchase of a home or car, or whether you or your spouse are going to go pick up your sick child from school, negotiation simply cannot be avoided.

Over the past few years, I have noticed a trend taking hold at an alarming pace – the trend of technology weeding out people’s jobs. This will not seem like a revelation to many of you.  After all, we have all seen the self-checkout lines at grocery stores and watch with bated breath as Tesla attempts to perfect a self-driving Uber. I just flew from LAX to Toronto to visit the Bombardier factory where the plane we took completely flew itself from takeoff to landing without a human being.  The pilots were there only to make us feel safe and actually fly the plane in the event something went terribly wrong – but of course, it did not. Once in Canada, I visited a McDonalds that was all but automated except for the cooks. Half of the jobs in the restaurant that traditionally had been needed were flat out cut.  It’s all fascinating but what really keeps me on edge is the slow boil of it all. Today, tasks have already been automated. Automated skills are coming next. What happens when technology replaces management, medical care (doctors) or even legal representation (lawyers)?  It may seem far-fetched but pay attention.  It’s already happening and will only continue to evolve at a more rapid pace now that the foundation has been laid.

Imagine a world in which professional sports were not transparent – a world in which the general public didn’t pay attention to games or matches.  Instead, every few days we would get news on wins, loses, rankings, and team value.  We would have no context for what a win meant, because we would not have seen the blood, sweat, and tears that went into the victory.

Growing up, the mother of a close friend of mine worked as a teacher. She always used to say that people looked at the wrong indicators to predict success. Grades, standardized testing, and essay writing almost never determined someone’s value. Instead, she could tell how someone was going to do in life based on the friends they kept in high school. If an individual spent time with people less intelligent than themselves, they were unlikely to ever reach their potential, having learned to aim lower than they could reasonably achieve. Similarly, if someone who was struggling decided to hang out with a more driven crowd, good habits were likely to wear off. Those are lifelong and largely subconscious lessons.

Last year I joined the acquisition and collection committee for the Museum for Contemporary Art (MOCA) in Los Angeles. As a result, I have been exposed to many different artistic styles, periods, and creators. The entire experience has led me to wonder, “what makes one piece of art better than another?” I eventually came to a conclusion after hours upon hours after considering countless pieces, genres, and artists.  The conclusion: one genre isn’t necessarily better or worse than the next but there are artists within each genre that are clearly better than the others.  

Have you ever been backed into a corner? I am speaking literally here. When you are backed into a corner, it means your options are limited. If you want to move, you only have one, maybe two directions you can go. If given the choice, I am willing to bet that a lot of people would prefer to have more freedom than that, which is why it always perplexes me when I watch people back themselves into corners with their decision making.

I once chose to go into a business with a man who had no long-lasting friendships. He had an abundance of nearly everything: energy, drama, wealth….but he lacked in one specific and vitally important area; relationships. When I looked at his personal and professional network, I noticed that everyone around him had only been present for a few years at most. He was like a billionaire Jason Bourne.

They say there are only two certainties in life, death and taxes.  I’d argue there is a third: change. Life always turns out different than we expect.  Sometimes our dreams and aspirations fade and disappear into the sunset.  Sometimes we manage to feel the joys of high achievement…but it never happens along the exact path we envisioned at the start. This realization is uncomfortable to some. The idea that we can never really execute our plans... But there is a secret very few people know. The best path, and subsequent result is SUPPOSED to be completely different than you initially planned on. 

Have you ever met someone who had a lot of passion? It is inspiring. A person with an ardent belief that things will work out possesses a magnetism that is intoxicating and contagious. A lot of people like this become business owners, and it is understandable. If you are good at XYZ, you will want to found a company that is the best at XYZ – like a chef wanting to open her own restaurant. But while these incredibly heartfelt and adrenalized people are great to get a drink with, I am always wary of them as business owners. In my experience, people like this are not successful.

We’ve all heard that time is relative, right? An hour spent watching your favorite movie passes much faster than an hour spent in traffic. Well, the same basic principles apply to personal productivity. Something you are excited to work on is likely to go much faster than the annoying tasks that you would rather not do. Unfortunately, sometimes the fate of our passion projects rely on those menial tasks that are the mental equivalent of staring at the bumper in front of you for 60 minutes.

When I was in my early – mid 20s I worked in a high stress sales position for a commercial finance company.  While the rewards of success in that position were amazing, few actually attained them.  There were on average 150 other men and women that had the same job within the company and I was #1 and also the youngest in the company to ever attain that rank.  We were given aggressive goals, and thus had a high failure rate and by extension, a high turnover rate.  I wound up staying there for five years, which was much longer than most. Extended time in an environment like that afforded the opportunity to study my colleagues.  I began to scrutinize. What made one guy succeed, and another fail? Was it dedication? Hours sunk into the job? Natural charisma? Turns out it was none of those things. Far and away the largest predictor of success at that company was attitude.  If someone had the innate belief that they were good enough to do the job, then they were going to do the job.

I often say that I only hire people with track records of excellence. I think that every business owner would agree that it is ideal to hire the best of the best – after all it is not controversial to want hard working, dedicated people on your team. What is controversial, however, is the way in which hiring managers determine who the best of the best are, and I think that everyone is doing it wrong.